Heath (my husband) and I decided to leave New York, our beloved home of ten years, over happy-hour crostini on a random Tuesday.
“Okay!” I said when he asked if I was ready. This was after a few months of Heath encouraging a move to a place with a more relaxed pace and a warmer climate.
Two months after our crostini conversation, we were sipping coffee on our sun-drenched terrace in Miami.
It seemed so fast to everyone else. But not to us. What’s there to wait for? Decision-making is really just trusting in yourself. We don’t have to be so serious about every decision that pops up, and ultimately, we need to stop being so hard on ourselves for the “bad” choices in our past. I think of it in terms of wanted or unwanted outcomes instead of “good” and “bad decisions.” And most decisions are reversible anyway. This makes driving a big change in your life so much easier.
Mundane decisions can be made easier by having a plan: figure out your outfits, meals, and calendar ahead of time. Batch your decision-making, even! For example, for sixty minutes every Sunday evening, you meal plan for the week. If you can learn to take care of certain tasks ahead of time, you can save time, and stress.
Bigger decisions just require getting quiet with yourself and tuning in to your intuition. It feels wild, but it’s also wise. Logic has a place in the world, yes: we can do the numbers, consider the options and the outcomes, and weigh the pros and cons until Christmas. But the most important decisions in life are seized by instinct. We feel them. That’s why confident decision-making is so commonly referred to as “listening to your gut.”
Logic isn’t everything and it never can be. To make good choices, you must trust your inner voice. If you don’t feel intuitively guided, that just means you are not fully aligned with yourself in the present moment. Maybe you’re stressed-out, overtired, or overthinking. That’s okay, too. (You might just need some quiet time, a walk outside, or more sleep.)
Inaction is action. Meaning, if you don’t move to Puerto Rico, forge ahead for that VP title, start a side hustle this year, or call off your less-than-satisfactory relationship, you are deciding to live in Chicago. You are deciding to remain in your job. You are deciding to reject entrepreneurship (and more dough). You are deciding to stay in an unhappy relationship. What you’re not changing, you’re choosing!
If you sense a big decision looming in your life, don’t hide from it! That makes it worse. Consider your options - there are at least three in every situation. Then get back to that gut!
Line up fully with your decision. Fall in love with it. That’s a decision you get to make, too (and a really good one).